How is it possible that the weekend is over already?
Saturday I spent the majority of my day recovering from the hangover left to me by nine 9-year olds spending the night at my home. And may I mention that they were all girls. This is only important because at 9 hormones are starting. As is the cattiness that only girls are good at. This includes making other girls cry and feel like crap. I saw this first hand and stopped it every time, letting the girls know that we would not be doing this or I'd be calling parents.
Yes, I did invite all these girls. And yes I got myself into it. However, the girls all loved it, I'm now the coolest mom at school, AND I didn't think that so many would be able to make it. Besides...I lived and almost enjoyed it. Almost.
I spent 2 hours of Saturday sacked out on my Aunt's couch. I was pretty much oblivious to the world around me and felt drugged when I tried to wake up before the 2 hours were up. After that time I was able to operate for the remainder of the day.
I sat the rummage sale at my aunts' house and when that was done went home and watched a movie and relaxed with Andy.
Sunday morning (this morning) Andy and I woke at 7, got ready to head to our friend, Sue's house, and went out to Happily Ever After. And for anyone that hasn't paid attention to when I've spoken of Happily Ever After (HEA) before, it is a absolute no-kill shelter which holds some of the sweetest animals I've ever met. These animals may have some issues, but are still looking for their fur-ever home. Today I walked 8 dogs: Georget, Charlie, Marilyn, Levi, Emily, Maxine, Dessi, and a new puppy that was so cute that I wanted to take him home. Andy said no. BULLY! (click on the dogs names that are blue and you will be taken to an adoption page where you can see them. Not sure why some of the dogs aren't up on the page, but they aren't. Humph!)
I love going out to HEA. I feel like I'm actually making a difference...even it is small. It makes me wish I could do more, but my time and love seem to be enough for the dogs. I'm hoping that this summer Andy and I can spend a couple more days a month there helping out. We've talked about taking the girls and taking turns watching the girls and helping out with whatever needs to be done. If there is a dog/cat that needs some brushing/petting and it is good with kids, then we'd let the kids help out there. It would teach the kids that volunteering and helping out less fortunate (whether animals or humans) is important. I'm hoping that this...along with some of the other things I'd like to do with the girls will help them be less selfish and more giving.
The rest of Sunday was spent running errands and then coming home and getting the kids ready for bed.
This weekend flew and I feel like it really never happened. Fortunately, this week looks less hectic than this last one. At least so far. I babysit Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday...as normal. I have Kalli's field trip on Wednesday, and Morning with Mom on Thursday with the girls (a morning that moms or whoever can make it goes to school in the morning with their kids to eat a little breakfast and then go to the classroom to visit and maybe do a little activity before school starts. Then, the only other thing going on this week is that Kalli has her first soccer practices this week. One on Monday and one on Wednesday. She is so unbelievably excited. And today we made sure that her soccer shoes fit, got her a ball, some soccer socks, some pocket-less shorts, and made sure that all the other supplies were close by. The season is starting! I figure I will take pictures tomorrow of her practicing with the other kids for you to see.
Cassie starts baseball with the Miracle League in June and this year I have stepped down from being team mom so that I can enjoy the game more and sit on the bleachers with the rest of the family to cheer Cassie on.
I'm very excited about the photo opportunities that this year presents. I'm hoping to get some real nice pictures to share and use on calendars for next year. Yes, I'm already looking at calendars for next year. I already have pictures printed out for the months of January, February, March, and April. I have found where I'm going to order the actual Calendars from and will order them when we have some extra money. I'm actually ahead of where I normally am at this point of the year. Go me!
Alright...it is 2:15 and Andy said that I had to be in bed and asleep before his alarm goes off at 3. Bully!
Monday
I blinked...where'd the weekend go?
Saturday
I'm ALIVE!!
Remember when I completely lost my mind and invited all of the girls from Cassie's class to come to my place (a duplex) and spend the night here? All 11, not including Cassie. Yeah? Well tonight is that night
And I'm here to report that it is 330 in the morning, the kids are all asleep, and I'm still alive. I've succeeded...overcome...and won! Take that...uh...witches? At this point I feel like I could leap over buildings in a single jump, run a marathon, or save babies from burning buildings. Unfortunately it is 330 in the morning and I should get to sleep before the first of them start waking up. And here I was looking forward to that marathon. Darn!
I'll fill you in on details tomorrow.
Thursday
Looking for: part time worker to fill rest of full time position
Ladies and Gentlemen....we have schedules. For the girls' summer sports, that is.
This year Kalli is playing soccer (May-June) and Cassie is playing baseball (June-August). AND, in the month of June we only have one overlap. Yeah us! I really wouldn't even call it an overlap as Cassie's game starts at 4 and Kalli's doesn't start until 6. However, it is one of those days that we'll have to watch the time close.
If you haven't received a schedule from me and want one, please let me know. My brain is a part time worker only lately and I may have missed someone. I sent out email about 10 minutes ago.
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Tomorrow is my sleep study with a CPAP on and I'm really hoping that once this is all figured out, my brain will come back to work for me full time. I've grown a little attached and this time off is really a little upsetting.
On that note.... It is 1:30am and I'm off to bed.
Tuesday
Random Recap
This post is going to be so random as I'm trying to recap from the past weekend that I didn't blog at all during. Hey, everyone deserves a weekend off now and then. Besides, before that I was on a total roll in the posting daily department.
Friday I drove a total of 4 hours for a 15 minute appointment in which we didn't even see the doctor. Can you say ridiculous? We did wonder around the outside of the hospital though and I took the chance to take a few pics.
Quick Cas, itch while you can.
Cassie has such a hard time during these recasts.
The girls outside the clinic. I'm sparing you all the flower/artsy ones I took. Your welcome.Sunday I did some running with my almost sister-in-law, Kelli. I have a project or two that I'm working on that I had to pick up supplies for and I'm also finishing up getting ready for Cassie's birthday party. You know...that one that I'm crazy for having in the first place. Yeah, no one has called yet to say that they are not coming and only 2 girls have passed on the sleeping over part. Gulp! So what are you doing this coming Friday? Wanna come help me stay sane?After a few hours of running, the girls and I got ready to go, we picked up Becky, and we headed to The Melting Pot.
The Melting Pot is a fondue restaurant that is so delicious that you end up leaving full and sedated. We had a girlie evening and while fun was had by all, I have to say that The Melting Pot is much more relaxing and enjoyable when you don't have 2 kids with you. Two children, that while they were well behaved and had a blast, needed help with everything and I was a little nervous about them being so close to a hot pan and hot liquids. Especially Kalli...the girl isn't known for being graceful. The girls enjoyed themselves though and we all left very full and happy.
The following pictures were all taken while at The Melting Pot.
Cassie and Kalli at The Melting Pot. Gotta love Cassie holding her sister some...
A GORGEOUS picture that I took of Cassie while at The Melting Pot. I love this picture because it really caught her beauty.
However, she looks much older then she should....therefore I don't like this picture.
Hey, not only am a mom, but I'm female too. I can change my mind and be complicated like that.
Thursday
Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's off to Milwaukee we go
Okay, I'm not going to say this out loud because then I will jinx it. Therefore, lean in close. No...closer. Come on, you aren't even moving. Lean in close.
The cold shoulder must have worked. I don't know what happened or why things changed, but I'm not about to look a gift horse in the mouth.
Anyhow...
Tomorrow (4-23) I'm headed to Milwaukee with the girls to get Cassie's cast changed. Seems silly to go to Milwaukee to take the cast off and put a new one on. 2 hour ride there, maybe 1 hour there, and another 2 hours back. Crazy, I know. I'm going to try to get Cassie into another doctor down at Children's for the next time we are down there. At least then I'll be seeing two doctors for my 4 hours of drive. Still doesn't seem to equal out though.
On this trip, Kalli will be coming along as Andy can't keep taking time off to get her off to school. Kalli is looking forward to the trip....even though she will probably sleep a good portion of the ride. You see, my little Kalli girl gets car sick, therefore, we have to give her motion sickness pills when we travel any distance. It is getting to the point that anything more then across town is too far. And for some reason, the pills make her sleep. Not that I'm necessarily complaining...at least I'm not listening to "I'm bored" and "Are we almost there?"
Also on this trip, my mother-in-law has volunteered to ride along to keep me company. So I'll have someone other then the girlies to talk to. I still plan on taking some 5-hour energy because I'm still no better with the not feeling tired situation. I go on this coming Friday to sleep at the clinic again with a CPAP machine to hopefully get this situation fixed. I really am not enjoying the falling asleep during the day feeling.
Alright, it is now almost 1am. I have to be up, showered, dressed, have the kids ready, and be at my mother-in-law's home for 6:30am. This would be my cue to go to bed.
I'm bringing my camera tomorrow so hopefully I'll have some pictures to share in my post tomorrow night.
Wednesday
Proudly reporting just for you
Today was the Marathon of Knowledge. I volunteered all day reading questions to all the different grades and I have to tell you...some of those questions were not easy. 4th Grade question: What are the 3 branches of Government? I mean there are more, but honestly, I can't remember them all because of all the questions that I asked today. In between reading, I would go to Kalli's classroom and help out there. At the end of the day the teacher really appreciated my being there because the kids were being a little obnoxious. Oh who am I kidding, a few of the kids were being complete brats. Because of previous misbehavior the kids had 7 minutes to serve. They have to put their heads down and be quiet during this time instead of having play time. Well, I spent the entire rest of the day telling kids to put their head down and to sit down and to be quiet. Comes down to the kids only took about 1 minute of time off because of much fooling around went on.
There is one boy, J, who is really a lot of....work. I ended up pulling him out into the hall and he was fooling around out there too and slid himself down onto the floor while I was trying to talk to him. I said, "excuse me! I won't let my own kids misbehave and be this disrespectful and definitely won't let someone else's child."
In talking with the teacher later, we are pretty sure J has ADHD, however his dad won't let him be tested. In other words, his dad is keeping him from possibly getting treated. I'm no doctor, but if people were questioning whether your child could have ADHD, wouldn't you wanted him or her tested? Don't get me wrong...I don't think all kids have ADHD, some are just brats. However, look into it. If the doctor suggests meds then try them. See if they help. If not...at least you tried. Parents are so worried about this stigma and really...come on. Isn't it more important that your child is happy and stays out of trouble?
So all in all it was a very fun day. Somewhat.
And I'm actually getting somewhat tired so I'm going to attempt to get some sleep tonight.
Oh...and I'm sure some of you are wondering how Cassie and Kalli did on their Marathon of Knowledge question. Well...they both answered every question correctly. All 100 questions. And then all the bonus questions that they had. To say that I'm proud is an understatement. A huge understatement.
Until tomorrow. g'nite.
Pumping up for the Marathon
I know what you are all thinking, and yet are afraid to say out loud. And yes, I am on a posting streak. Other then NaBloPoMo, I think this may be the longest stretch I've done in a long while. See, staying up until 1:30 - 3:00 has its advantages.
However, there are times that I'd like to be able to go to bed earlier. Tonight is one of those nights. Tomorrow I have to be awake and ready to go once I bring the girls to school. Tomorrow is the Marathon of Knowledge of school and I volunteered to help out all day. They took me up on the whole day thing and I'll be reading to kids for the entire day. Now, while I'm not positive of what this exactly means (I'll find out at 9 tomorrow morning - which is actually this morning) I'm pretty sure this means that I'll spend the day reading questions to the kids and quizzing them. This means lots of reading and therefore, probably a sore throat. I plan on bringing water. And soda. And hard candies. And gum. And maybe some chapstick.
It'll be a fun day over all though, I'm sure. The girls are pumped and I went through questions like 2-3times tonight. We'll go through them one more time in the morning to try to keep the answers fresh in their heads.
Now I'm sure you are wondering what the questions are. I'd love to type them all up right now, but seriously? That would be 200 questions plus the bonus questions. That would be a lot of typing this early in the morning. Maybe I'll work on that tomorrow, but only if I run out of things to do. That is seriously a lot of typing.
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Today I received another call for Cassie's party. The girl is coming to the makeover part, but won't be sleeping overnight. Can't say that I'm overly sad. I don't know what I'm going to do with all these girls. What on Earth was I on when I concocted this idea? And what possessed me to write out those invites and allow Cassie to bring them to school to hand out? The worst part is that I have no one that will take the challenge of spending the night here with me. Something about me making my bed and now having to lay in it.
Now I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that I won't get much time that night to lay in my bed or sleep so I'm pretty much left with 'making my bed'. And I'm getting the feeling that people don't feel bad for me at all. Whenever I talk about it people just laugh.
Honestly though, I know that it is crazy and I should be committed for even thinking about inviting this many girls to my home, but I know that it is Cassie's favorite birthday yet (it hasn't even happened yet) and that she will probably never forget it. And for her, I'd do crazy things. Things that could get me committed because I love seeing that smile. Hearing that giggle. and watching those eyes twinkle.
It is amazing what one child can do to a person. I used to just think about me and now I find myself just wanting my girls to be happy. As long as they are healthy and happy nothing else in the world matters.
To prove that I'm even more insane though, because you need more proof, I'm checking into how much it would be to rent out a roller rink for Kalli's birthday and then inviting her whole class. I'd also let Cassie invite a few friends so she'd have a few kids her age.
So to recap, I'm nuts, but my kids rock because they have awesome parties and awesome parents. At this rate what on Earth will I do for their 16th Birthdays. Someone better tie me up that year.
Tuesday
April 19, 2010
Computers are a pain, sometimes. Okay...maybe even more then sometimes.
Right now I want to kick my desktop computer. For some unknown reason it won't load internet pages. It is connected to the internet, but that is it. It's like it is connected but can't fully communicate with the internet or something. I don't know...all I do know is it is flippin' annoying.
So, at the moment I'm using the laptop and giving my computer the silent treatment. That'll teach it!
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I'm so proud of Cassie. Today I took the girls to school as I was going to keep Cassie home this morning because she had an appointment, but decided to sent her for that hour and then pick her up. Upon getting in the car, I realized that we didn't have her wheelchair. Instead, her chair was in Andy's car. At his work. On the west side of town. UGH!
I dropped the girls at school, came home to take a quick shower, ran across town to get chair, came back across town to the school, and then took Cassie to her appointment. I asked her if she wanted to try without the wheelchair for the day or if she wanted it and she said that she wanted to go without it. I was so impressed that she made the decision to try without it. And I have to say that when she came home today and asked if she could take the chair tomorrow because she has gym, but on Wednesday she doesn't want to take it again, I could have burst with pride. She is making these decisions on her own and whether she knows it all she is becoming more independence and building up those muscles and therefore her endurance. Have I mentioned how proud of her I am? I kinda want to come up with some sort of reward for her doing this on her own, but I don't know what I would do.
She has grown up so much in the past few weeks that I find myself looking at her in awe. Where did my baby go? And who is this pre-teen?
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On Wednesday, the 21st, Cassie and Kalli will be having their Marathon of Knowledge at school. This is a major fundraiser for the school and consists of the kids each memorizing 100 grade appropriate questions. The girls work on getting donations that are collected after the marathon day. As this is our first year doing this, we've really sucked at the getting donations part. Therefore, "Hi...Cassie and Kalli are participating in a Marathon of Knowledge this year where they help to raise money for the school by increasing their knowledge by memorizing 100 questions. Would you care to donate anything? You can either contribute a flat amount or by how many questions the girls get correct. Money is not collected until after Wednesday but is due by April 30th." Let me know if you are interested in donating, but have not done so. This happens to be the largest fund raiser for the school so it is fun. All the kids in the school receive a t-shirt and get to eat in their classrooms or, if weather permits, outside.
I will be spending Marathon day at the school quizzing the kids. Sound like fun?? Yeah, I get breaks as they are needed though and food is provided, so it isn't so rough. :)
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Update on Cassie's birthday party: As of this moment I have 2 calls that have said they will be here for both parts. Some of the kids told Cassie they are coming, but I don't have a phone call verifying that yet. And as of today, absolutely no one has said that they can't make it.
Sunday
Burning the place down
Tonight we had my brother-in-law and sister-in-law over for dinner and to visit. We decided to keep it very simple and had burgers and hotdogs with chips, salsa, and jalapeno cheese dip. It was a simple yet good meal. Especially with the nicer weather we've been having.
So Andy starts the grill, get's the burgers, unwraps them and goes out to put them on the grill. He then comes back into the house and from out in the garage where I was talking with my sister-in-law I hear him say, "what the hey!" I ignore it figuring one of the cats was on the table or something.
A little while Andy calls me into the house and says as I come in, "don't be mad and don't kill me." I always love when those words are spoken as you know it isn't going to be a good thing. I look at the stove to see ash and burnt paper all over. "What on Earth?" I ask.
It ends up that when he took the freezer paper off the burgers he tossed it onto the stove. Where I was burning a pretty smelling candle. When Andy walked back into the house there was fire happening on the stove. He got it out and then once things were controlled called me in.
I didn't freak. Instead I asked him why it was that he was trying to burn down my home and I told him that I really like it here. I also gave him a hard time about how he should know by his age not to put things over open flame. Mind you, there was nothing around the stove that would have caught on fire from something like paper as it doesn't burn a high flame or very hot, still though....it is the idea that it happened. It was a simple mistake, but reminds you of how careful you have to be with where you put things. And how it is a good thing we now have renters' insurance.
I will not stop burning candles as I do it safely...I will just have to keep the love of my life away from them. I'm sure he won't mind as that means he will have to stay out of the kitchen.
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Friday at school, Kalli got hurt. I was volunteering in the library so they came to get me to 'kiss her boo'. She was playing with Cassie and her friend. Cassie's friend was on the monkey bars and Kalli got a little too close to her. Kalli got kicked in the face and fell onto the woodchips. Her face was sore and scratched up, but otherwise she was fine. This is until I took her with me to the library until recess was over. Once she was away from everyone and just with me she lost it. She cried into my shoulder while I told her that she was okay, that I knew it hurt, and all those soothing things you say to your children to calm them.
After a bit she was better and I walked her to her class with ice pack in tow. Everyone in her class asked her what happened and were concerned about her. By the time the day was over, she was sore, but otherwise was back to normal.
The next day I took this picture of her face.
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This weekend was taken up by pricing for upcoming rummage sales and also by going through everything in my home sorting and organizing asking "what can I get rid of?" I want organization. I want the 'junk' gone. I want a home...not a storage facility. I want to be able to find things without searching. And I want to be rid of CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Sydrome) I want to be able to have people call and say we're on our way...or just show up...without freaking as I look around and have everyone pitch in to straighten things some.
Not that the place is that bad. Mainly just lived in, but it is enough to make the OCD part of me want to up and move. I am constantly cleaning...straightening and sorting, dusting and doing dishes, and the one thing that I'll never be able to be rid of....vacuuming. I seriously, vacuum the kitchen and living room at least 3-4 times a day. Anytime I see something on the floor I have to vacuum the whole room. And the saddest part is that I'm not exaggerating at all. My vacuum almost never is unplugged and one of the only times it is unplugged is to move to a different floor to vacuum.
Now mind you, I don't vacuum the bedrooms and basement this much. Thank goodness! But the rooms that I see the most and live in...(sigh) I can't help it. I worry about how it looks when I see something on the floor. I worry about Cassie's allergies. I worry about all the dirt that must be tracked into the house. I worry about how cluttered the room is. And yes, I am a worry-wart and I do worry about being a worry-wart as well.
All this to say that I'm keeping busy and that I'm very tired. On that note...and the fact that it is 2am...I'm going to bed.
Friday
Taking Care of Paula
Tonight I am taking care of me.
Tonight both the girls are gone sleeping over places. Earlier I cleaned the entire living room, including moving the couch out and vacuuming the couch. I then headed upstairs and cleaned the bathroom before taking a shower.
I just came downstairs and was going to start on the kitchen when I thought... "screw it! I deserve a night off." I made a bowl of popcorn grabbed my last wine cooler and sat down here to play some games and to blog.
I looked over at Andy, who is playing Xbox online as he does every Friday, and he looked at me. I nodded at my popcorn and beverage and said, "I'm taking care of me." He nodded and said that it was good that I do it.
My psychologist would be proud. She is always telling me to take time for me and to allow myself to do nothing. And for the most part, I can't. Tonight though, I decided to just stop and sit... (Not that it is easy to do) and allow myself a break.
Cassie informed me today that it is 11 days until her party. She isn't excited at all. Seriously...I only think the ENTIRE school knows about her party. And I'm more then likely not over exaggerating that much.
Yesterday (the day handed out the invites) evening I received the first RSVP. One girl coming and staying overnight. Then today, Cassie comes home from school and informs me that 4 more girls are coming, but one can't stay overnight. Alright...we are up to 5 for the makeover now and 4 for the overnight. And, again I'll say it, the invites were given out yesterday. I did tell Cassie, though, to have the girls call me, or have a parent call me to make it official.
Have I mentioned the fact that I'm a little scared? Only one no go for sleepover so far. I know that a lot can happen yet, but the nerves are beginning to twitch. I think I may have been under the influence of drugs when I made this decision. Some really strong drugs. So...at the worst, I will have 11 girls, plus my own here for the makeover and then 10 girls, plus Cassie, for the overnight. How bad could it be??
Someone catch me...I'm feeling light-headed.
Wednesday
You said you wanted me to post more...
I have a few problems. And I'm coming to you, my adoring fans...er...fan, for your input. If not....hey, I should be able to at least make you laugh...on my behalf of course. Now where to start.
Let's start off with something more simple. Last night I went in for a Sleep Study to attempt to find out why on Earth it is that I'm so unbelievably exhausted. Ya know...like the fact that I can't keep my eyes from wanting to shut and stay shut when driving a little distance. For some reason other drivers don't care for it when you try to drive with your eyes shut. Also: people within the vehicle you are driving don't really like it also. It makes them nervous. Darn pansies.
So I went for my study and I slept. I woke up a few times to move some, and it did take me a while to fall asleep. HELLO...not the easiest to fall asleep when you are this wired.
This morning they woke me (side note: one will wake faster and be more alert then normal when being waken by a stranger in your not-normal setting. Good Morning Nurse Lady!) and told me that I have Sleep Apnea and will have to come back another night to sleep with a CPAP on to find out what pressure works for me. Yeah...that was a lot of words to get the idea across that I will be going back to sleep in not-my-bed at not-my-home with a scuba diving type mask on forcing air into me. (And I'm now wondering why is it no one has ever inflated and floated away while hooked up to a CPAP...I'm imagining a cartoon of someone floating against the ceiling with the tubing tethering them to the machine. Spouse in the room, looking up..."uh...honey?")
But I digress. All this is to say that I do have Sleep Apnea (in the first 1/2 of my study I stopped breathing every 9 minutes, on average. Cool, eh? Also: Never before did I study for sleeping. Maybe that is why babies don't sleep through the night at first...they are studying how to. Yeah yeah...bad humor. It's 11:48 at night, give me a break.) In a couple weeks I will go back and then work on getting my own CPAP for here at home. I'm hoping to then dream of scuba diving in some beautiful reef and waking up refreshed. Hey, a girl can hope.
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I'm going to once again try to prove that I'm either completely crazy or an awesome mom. At the end of this month I have invited all 11, you read that right...eleven, girls from Cassie's class to come to Cassie's VERY LATE birthday party.
A friend of mine, who is actually a Mary Kaye consultant, and I will be giving the girls mini facials and teaching them a little about skin care. The girls will then be able to put a little age appropriate make up on (aka lip gloss and light shimmering eye shadow) Yup...keeping things age appropriate...no making these girls look like hoochies here. I've also asked my almost sister-in-law to come help do mini-manicures too. Alright, so we are just painting nails...I can make believe if the kids can.
Then, just to test my sanity, I've invited all 11 of these girls to spend the night here. At my home. Where I will be.
Andy has already told me he doesn't care what I do because he will be playing his Xbox all night. That is 'man' for "you're on your own toots!" I figure there is a very low chance that all the girls will be able to come and stay over anyway. Of course, with my luck...
Please stay open that night if I need to be rescued. Thank you :)
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I love Kalli. Really I do. She is so unbelievably sweet. She is gorgeous and very smart. She is very attached to me...maybe too much at times, but that is ok. She is my baby after all.
Kalli is also hilarious. I mean shaking your head laughing hilarious, at times. Most of the time she doesn't even try to be funny. She is just showing you something or telling you something and after you laugh she will blush and try to hide some.
Tonight, I'm sitting with Cassie, checking her teeth after she brushes them and Kalli comes in by us ready for bed (in long shirt) and says, "I can give myself a wedgie. Look...". And then she does. She pulls up on her underwear until it is seated just inside her seat and then she says proudly, "see...".
Now I'm not sure, but when did this become a talent? I just laughed and shook my head and said wow. Cassie looked at me as if to say that her sister was nuts and continued with her teeth. I told Kalli to go show her daddy what she could do and she blushed and hid. I only wish these were the moments that I could get on video because seriously...this is blackmail material in the making!!
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I don't know what to do about this next one. The girls had 'Spring Pictures' at school a few weeks ago. I think that it is silly that they are now taking pictures two times a year and trying to get parents to buy more. I mean hello, 1 sheet (8x10, 2 3x5s, OR a sheet of wallets) is $12. RIDICULOUS!
Well, that is until the pictures came home. See, they send the pics home, you keep what you want, send back any you don't want, and any money for those you've kept. The pictures that came home of my children are breath-taking. I think that they are beautiful. And I'm going to have a very hard time sending them back.
See what I mean?? And then I put the girls' beginning of the year next to the recent ones and...WOW! They have changed so much in just 6 months. Where did my little girls go??
Agreed? I just look at those pictures and am stunned. There are no words....
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Okay, a couple last pictures of things. No long story to go along with them really, I just liked them so there you go :)
Brady wanted to be carried the other day so I put him front facing in the carrier I have. He loved it and I got things done.
I brought some fake flowers from the dollar store the other day to make a little seasonal bouquet here at home. Here is what I made up. Nothing super, but I like it. And it adds color to my kitchen. Besides....they make me smile when I am doing dishes.
Monday
My Perfect Mascot
Things have been a little crazy around here. I'm finding that I'm overwhelmed and am trying to slowly work on that. I've been trying to take a little time for myself lately and concentrating on taking better care of myself. This is something that I've neglected severely until recently. And now I find myself trying to find things to do that are more for me, but not without guilt. For example: one of the smaller things, we've been trying hard to stay home on Sundays as a family and spend time doing what "we" want to do. Of course I do feel guilty about this because I feel that I'm letting others down by not being there for them or doing things for others. And this is just a small example.
My therapist and I have been talking about my guilt issues and how I have to put myself first, but I have a hard time because I don't want to be selfish. And somehow my brain has programmed itself to think anytime I'm doing anything for myself, I'm being selfish. I want to be self-less. I want to give til it hurts.
Only problem is that I'm at the point where it is hurting. Hence the fact that I'm trying to take care of me. (sigh) But is most definitely not easy.
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Let's add to this the fact that the medicines that I'm on have been being shifted around and changes some so my body is messed up to say the least. Again...an example.
- 7-730am: Wake up
- 830am: Kids onto bus
- 9-10am: OMG I'm tired
- 10am-2pm: get stuff done, supper started, etc
- 2-4pm: OMG why on Earth am I so tired
- 4-8pm: get some stuff done, eat supper, help kids with stuff
- 8-830pm: WOO HOO I'm awake. Who wants to clean? Anyone wanna go for a walk outside? How about we reorganize the pantry? (This is the point at which Andy looks at me like I'm out of my mind and goes to bed - well at about 9/930pm)
- 830pm-12/1am: I clean, I play on the computer, I try to get rid of this WIDE AWAKE feeling. It doesn't stop until around 1 in the morning.
- 1am-ish: Lay down in bed and pass out
- 7-730am: rinse and repeat
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This past Sunday we had Easter Lunch with Andy's side of the family. His aunt took us all to Legends for their buffet and I have to say that it was pretty darn delicious. After we ate, I took the girls and my niece, Kyra, out to take some pictures. I would have taken Kaitlynn with, however, she was busy running around and enjoying herself. I managed to get some pictures of her later when she was sitting still for about 2 minutes. :)
First off we have Cassie. She is up a tree without a paddle. There was some beautiful trees around the restaurant so I took full advantage of them. Cassie is a little nervous without her feet on the ground, but smiled for me anyhow.
Then there is Kalli. She is a monkey at heart and loved when I lifted her up into the crevice of the tree. She stood there like a queen looking down at her subjects.
At a different tree we stopped and I got some pictures of the three girls together. I love that even with how different they all look, you can see that they are related. Cousins til the end. :)
Then I took a few of Kyra alone. She is turning into such a beautiful young lady. I honestly am not a fan of how grown up she is starting to look, but not much anyone can do about that. However, she still comes and sits on my lap to cuddle, so that is all that matters. Look at that picture...can you say senior picture??
Then there is my little peanut girl. Kaitlynn did sit still every now and then, but for the most part she was on the move. It is hard to keep a 15 month old down. She too is getting so big. I am not sure when that happened because I was there the day she was born...and I'm pretty sure that was just last week.
It was a nice day spent with family and visiting some. Afterwards, Andy and the girls dropped me at home so I could have some alone time and they headed over to his brother's house so that the cousins could play some more.
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As you know I fell a couple weeks back and ended up getting 10 stitches in my knee and an air cast on my opposite ankle. (and that isn't to mention the tetanus shot...ouch, hurts to think about it)
Stitches are out now and things are feeling much better. I purchased a more low-file brace for my ankle and I wear it if I am going to be doing a lot of stairs at home or if I'm going out anywhere. I will slowly stop wearing it at home and then probably will stop wearing it when just going to store or anything. Whenever I have to do a lot of walking on uneven ground though, you can bet it will be on my foot.
Miss Becky, got me a little something the other day and it fits me perfectly. Meet Mr Bump...
Becky says that he is perfect for me because I am always hurting myself. Which is very true. Mr Bump now lives right in front of my computer monitor to keep me company. We spend lots of time together, Mr Bump and me, because we have a lot in common. We both get hurt quite often. He is my perfect mascot. now if only he had a little camera hanging around his neck. Maybe I'll have to look through the girls' barbies or try to come up with something. Thank you Becky :)
Wednesday
April 7, 2010
Today was a very interesting day.
Andy took the day off because Cassie and I had to go down to Milwaukee. I drove the 2+ hours there, had an appointment for about 3 hours, and then drove the 2+ hours home. On the way there I was beginning to feel like I couldn't keep my eyes open. (this is something that has been happening quite a bit lately when I drive far distance) I stopped at a gas station and we picked up some refreshments and I got a little bottle of, what I now know as, magic.
I drank this little bottle of not so horrible tasting, yet not that good either, stuff and within a few minutes I felt its effects. I was able to drive from there until we were almost home without feeling like 'I shouldn't be driving'. And by then I was close enough and talking with Cassie about how she was starving.
While in Milwaukee we went to Children's Hospital for an appointment with an Orthopedic doctor there. So far things are looking okay, but because one of Cassie's ankles are getting tighter (harder to get in her leg brace) she will be in casts for the next couple months. And every 2 weeks we have to get her cast taken off and a new one put on, therefore stretching her ankle more. And we have to go to Milwaukee for the appointments. Every 2 weeks. For about 2 months. To have a cast taken off, the leg looked at, and a new cast put on. In Milwaukee.
I'm not a rocket scientist, but I'm pretty sure that there is someone that can take a cast off, look at an ankle, and put a new cast on closer to home then 2+ hours. Now I know that the doctor in Milwaukee is pediatric, and I know that he is familiar with Spina Bifida, but he is also 2+ hours away. Not only is that a long time to be in a car with a child, but it is also 3/4 tank of gas gone out the window. So, I'm again taking donations...which I often do on here...to help supply gas for the van to get us back and forth from Cassie's appointments. Also, if you want to leave a tip for refreshments/lunch along the way, that would be great.
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This year the Easter Bunny really tested me because he bought the girls finger paint. That would be paint. That you use your fingers for. And then your mom who has OCD freaks out and dies. Yup...thanks a lot Easter 'Fr*ckin' Bunny.
But I came back to life...that is what Easter is all about after all...and I let the girls play with the paint outside, with some of daddy's old shirts on, while taking deep breaths. Oh...and the container of wipes close by. Just in case someone wanted to wipe their fingers clean. Please.
It actually wasn't that horrible. I found a top to an ice cream bucket to put paint on and they mixed colors as needed. They had a good time. And I lived.
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Our friendly gerbil, Remy, is an artist. A while ago I put an old, yellow, hard plastic cup in her cage. (no worries mom...it's not Tupperware) After a bit she started nawing on it. My thought was that it was a good way to wear down her teeth and keep her entertained.
The other day while cleaning her cage I decided that it really looked like an art piece, so I took a picture. 
And, why yes, I am that lady who just posted a picture of a chewed up cup made by her gerbil. But it is so Purrty!
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This week I brought out the bouncy seat thingy (yes that is the proper term) for Brady to try out.
I had to use a blanket around him to help his body keep from swaying, but he really enjoyed it. He smiles in it and looks at all the toys. He is doing lots of reaching for them too. In fact, he kept grabbing on to the steering wheel.
See...he is smiling at me like, "yeah Auntie Paula...I'm just going around the block." I keep trying to tell him about keeping his hands at 10 and 2, but he just wasn't getting it. Kids these days!
Tuesday
April 5, 2010
I had a whole post written. Then my internet browser decided to update and I lost everything I had typed. (enter cursing under breath here)
It is now 12:15 in the morning and I really need to get some sleep. Therefore, I'm going to try to upload some pics and I'll work on the real post tomorrow.
The girls in their Easter dresses. I like the simple springy dresses.
Kalli took a moment from hunting for eggs to pose...Just for YOU!Actually she just loves to pose like this. I don't get it either.
Cassie flying her kite while Kalli watches.
Getting a little artsy. Because, ya know, that is how I like to roll.And also...yesterday was my friend, Bill's birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BILL!!
Kids
KIDS
That word right there says so much and can be said in so many tones that it leaves a lot for interpretation.
When my girls were were little they were such little bundles of joy. I watched them sleep, held them while they slept just so that I could be close to them and smell their wonderful baby scent, I pondered how it is that they came from two tiny cells and somehow transformed into this little human...this baby that somehow I loved more then my life itself. I'd have given anything to keep my baby safe. Their first smiles, giggles, and all the ones that came after filled my heart until I thought it would burst.
When they became toddlers (each of them in their own time) I found myself saying "no" more then I ever thought a person could possibly say it in one day. I also found myself saying things that I never thought a person would say, never mind that it was it was me that was saying it. "Don't lick the window", "Stop sitting on your sister's face", "No banging your head on the wall" are just several of the phrases that passed through my lips. Why is it that my children liked licking smooth surfaces? I can't count the number of times I told them not to lick something. And then all the times I told them "no touching", moved them away from things, and then watched as they looked at me with defiance in their eyes and went back and did it again. I should have seen it as a sign, but they were my precious angels.
When they got to 4-K and Kindergarten (As Kalli is right now) I find myself looking at them wondering where the baby went. They are beginning to get a social life and the fact that Kalli knows our number by heart is a bad thing. She has given it out to friends that actually call her. She is getting calls and is talking to her friends like she is a teen. Only not as long (thankfully). This seems to be an age that kids become wonderful helpers...at least my kids. They want to help more and while helping it gives them that chance to ask a million questions. Now, mind you, Kalli hasn't stopped talking since the moment that she started. However now that she reading she wants to know why things say what they say. She gives me a full report of what went on in the classroom that day. Down to who got in trouble and for what. She watches Brady and Kaitlynn even when I'm right there and makes sure the cats stay out of trouble. She is my informer. You want to know anything?? She knows it. She listens to everything people say, but only responds or lets you know she is listening when it is to her benefit. At this age Cassie had her first little crush and for Kalli it is the same. Kalli has informed me who she is going to marry, but that she isn't going to start dating him until they are in High School.
Then we move onto Cassie's age....9. At nine, at least for Cassie, they really start to work on their teenage angst. Cassie is more sure of herself then last year or the year before, but at the same time she is more unsure. She is still Miss Social Butterfly at school but still stays out of trouble. However, her attitude has needed some adjusting and still needs more. She has started the one word answers to questions. She rolls her eyes at me from time to time...which by the way only makes me want to knock her head off her shoulders while every hair on the back of my neck stands on end. She is becoming a teen before my eyes, and in my opinion, at too young of an age. She has mood swings...going from laughing to crying and back again. Sometimes even laughing at nothing and not being able to stop. I find myself several times stepping back and waiting for her head to spin around Exorcist style. I love the girl, yet I'm not sure we are both going to make it through her teen years.
Cassie is testing her limits. She is trying things she doesn't normally do and seeing what happens. And due to things like this she has found herself grounded for the first time. For a week. From her DSI. Fortunately for me, she knows that she was at wrong and didn't argue or fight it at all.
Cassie is becoming increasingly more frustrated at things. Tonight it took us almost an hour to complete her homework. A one page, single sided, math worksheet. Mind you that math is her hardest subject, but tonight was ridiculous. There was crying and yelling and pulling out of hair...and that was just what I did. Ok...I didn't really cry, but I wanted to. I know that everyone learns differently and I'm really trying to find a way to teach Cassie things that works for her to make it click, but so far I'm failing terribly. The problems were simple multiplication (which she is having trouble memorizing) and the answers were right there in front of her, but she still wasn't getting it. I would coax her through it until she saw it and then we'd move onto the next question. And it was the same thing. It was like she had no short term memory whatsoever. I seriously put my head in my hands and laughed a little too hysterically.
Then at bedtime she started crying because she wanted to cuddle with me. She has become increasingly cuddly and needing of me lately. She just wants to be held and reminded that she is loved, important, and that she is safe. I know she has anxieties (she actually asked if we locked the doors the other night) but my heart almost is breaking because I'm not sure what is going on inside of that head. I hold her and at times she starts crying, not even knowing, herself, why she is crying.
For me, also, I watch other people's children. I find myself falling more and more in love with these little people that don't really truly belong to me. (though as I do become more attached and watch these little ones grow I like to think that a little piece of them is mine. I teach them, I love them, kiss and hug them as much as possible, and as needed...am a second mom for them.) I find myself willing to jump in front of a bus to save them. Watching them sleep and holding them longer then I should when they are sleeping just to smell their scent. I feel like I'm back at the beginning only I don't get to keep these little ones. The little ones will have me pulling at my hair as they grow as well. (as Kaitlynn already has me at sometimes....toddlers!) Kids.
And then it comes back to the mom...as everything always does. I love my kids with every molecule of my being. Yet they make my emotions go from pulling at my hair and wanting to run down the road screaming, all the way to crying silently because I don't know what to do to make them better. I have to say now that I don't think that I was informed of all this when I signed on to be a mom. It may have been in the fine print, but who really reads that anyway.
Thursday
Paula: The Good Times, The Bad Times, and the Body that Hates Her
Last week Andy called me from work and told me that he had been called into a meeting with his team leader, supervisor, and the plant supervisor. It was a spontaneous meeting And the conversation went something like this...
Supervisor: We want to have a meeting with the plant supervisor, the team leader, you and I.He must have gotten that look on his face because his supervisor told him that it wasn't anything bad.
Andy: Alright...when?
Supervisor: Right now.
Andy: Okay...
Andy went into the room and sat down, still nervous. It is at this point that they started telling him how much they appreciate everything that he has been doing. For several months now he has been coming in 2 hours early several times a week (some entire weeks) and learning part of the team leader's job. He has also been cross trained in many of the other ares of the plant in the past year. Andy has also done most of the team leader's job when she is not at work.
In the meeting, they said that some people would have quit or complained by now because of the extra work load and the expectations that have been placed on him. The supervisor and plant supervisor commended him on his attitude and his willingness to learn. They told Andy that he absorbs new information like a sponge and is then ready for new challenges.
And then...he was given a promotion. And a raise. I'm so unbelievably proud of him. His hours are changing some too. He was working 7-3:30, but now he will have to go in earlier so he will be working 5-1:30. While I have to admit that it has got to suck getting up so early in the morning. Is there really a A.M. version of 3:30? Seriously?? However, he is enjoying the being done at 1:30 and I am loving having him home earlier.
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Last week was the girls' Spring Break from school and while we didn't do too much extraordinary, we did have a nice week. The girls played in the basement a lot, showing me that they can get along and solve their own problems.
On Friday, the last day of Break, I took the girls to Chuck E. Cheese for pizza and games. However, before heading there for fun and excitement we stopped off at our local salons and Cassie got her eye brows waxed for the first time. As of late it seems that some of the hair on her face is starting to darken. Mainly eye brows and a little bit on the upper lip. We started with eye brows as well...honestly, I come from a family of uni-brows. Cassie inherited this wonderful trait as well.
Before: Uni-brow and hairyAfter all was said and done, Cassie loved it. She kept saying that she was so pretty now. And I kept correcting her by saying that she was always pretty...this just makes her eye brows look that little bit more defined and clean. And it is very true.
After: cleaned up and looking fairly good.Next time I will have them round the insides a little more so it looks less treky looking.
So, we've talked in the past about how my body hates me, right? And about how I'm very coordinated? Well...I have a story to show just how true these things are.
Sunday morning we were walking dogs and I rolled my ankle. Of course my ankle rolling and then giving out completely caused me to fall on the gravel road. I stopped my face from hitting the ground with my hands and surprisingly never lost the dog. As I was laying on the ground the dog, Emily, came back and looked at me as if to say, "why are you on the ground?"
Andy was a little ways in front of me and turned back to see me completing my fall to the ground and then rushed to see if I was okay. (fortunately he was the only one to see my embarrassment) I said that I was okay and I tried to get up and walk off the pain in my ankle. It wasn't really helping, but I was hoping. I then mentioned how my knee was really hurting and that I was sure it was scrapped up and that I'd have another bruise. I told Andy that I didn't want to look, but should. I pulled up my pants leg and what I saw made my stomach flip and Andy say "oh my God". It wasn't pretty. I had gouge in my knee and it looked like a flap of skin was hanging there some. I pulled my pant leg back down and thought about trying to walk this off as well, but I gave up and went back to the house.
Before: Open, fleshy looking boo-boo. This picture actually doesn't show how bad it really was.
After: Bruises setting in now, the girls say my stitches make my skin look like they are lips.It hurts to move my knee and just thinking about bumping it makes me cringe.
And now for the question of the evening. When you have an injured ankle/leg they tell you that when you are going up the stairs to lead with the good leg and when you are doing down the stairs to lead with the bad. Up with the good, Down with the bad. However, how do you do stairs when both legs are bad?? Yeah, I haven't figured it out yet either. For now I just do my best with as little moaning as possible and hope that I am not sweating by the time I get to the other end of the stairs. Yes, it is a sad life that I have here. I'm thinking of making a sitcom out of it. I'll just simply call it "Paula: Good Times, Bad Times, and the Body that Hates Her". Has a certain ring to it, doesn't it?
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I feel like I have so much more to post about, but sleep is a little more important and it is almost 11:00pm. I'll work on it tomorrow, if time presents itself. ;)
Tuesday
Bruises, Allergies, Flowers, oh my!
Look... I'm back. Two days in a row. Okay, yesterday didn't REALLY count. One paragraph isn't really a descent post, but at least it let you know that I was still alive.
Lately, however, I have been having problems with bruising. I have no idea where the bruises are coming from, but they just show up. I'm at the point where I find a new bruise almost every day. I have them on my arms. I have them on my legs. Anyone that didn't know me would think I was being abused. And I'm afraid that as the weather gets warmer and shorts come out I will get more looks. Think I'm exaggerating?
This my left arm with all the bruises that are fading...finally.
And then there is my right arm...
Then there is my left leg. This is the inside of my leg.The outside has bruises as well, however they are fading.
This is my right leg. At least it is just one bruise.
And finally there is my upper left arm.I know where this one is from, but let me just say that it shouldn't have caused all this bruising.
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In other news, Cassie had allergy testing done on Monday. She has very sporadic allergies that include sneezing, itchy eyes and skin, runny nose, and lots of complaining. She had a total of 21 scratches done. 10 scratches in 2 batches and then one separate one.
She didn't enjoy the scratches...they don't feel the best to have done, but she took it in stride shedding only a few tears. Then when the itching started she became a little more irritated. The hardest part about allergy testing is the fact that you can NOT itch what-so-ever. This is enough to drive a person insane. I kept her sane for the time being by letting her play on my phone and showing her pictures of her back as the process went on.
This picture is a little bit after they started the 15 minute test period. You can see that under the B section there are some reacting already.
This is towards the end of the 15 minutes. Just a couple more minutes to go.You can easily see that there are some reactions. Some of the smaller reactions are hard to see though.
Yes...my daughter is allergic to her pets. Fortunately, I have OCD and vacuum a lot so she isn't affected. Yeah for OCD!!
So now we are going through a cleaning process and getting hypoallergenic covers for her mattress and pillow. I also am drying all her stuffed animals (which harbor lots of dust mites) for an hour on high heat to kill the mites. It is keeping me busy but hopefully these things along with her allergy pills will keep her from going insane.
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At this moment I have more live flowers in my house then I've ever had at one time. Becky bought me some daisies last week because she is the best friend ever. They are bright and cheerful and I've now split the flowers between in the kitchen and bathroom to spread the beauty.
Colorful flowers from Becky...THANK YOU BECKY!!Then, this weekend, Andy and I went out to a friend's bar and my friend bought me a rose. I am loving being able to see flowers throughout the day and I'm thinking that maybe I need to buy flowers every so often to cheer up my home.
Pretty rose from Bill.Lastly, a picture of the cutest little boy I know...
I did a little photo shoot with Brady today while he was with me. I think this is my favorite picture of him alone that I took today. I also got some pictures of him with Kalli. (Becky-I'm working on getting them all on disk for you. :)
The sweet prince. He is changing so much lately. Look at him holding that head up like a champ. And those beautiful blue eyes. And that dimple that shows up when he smiles.
Yes...I am in love with Becky's little boy!
March 16, 2010
Yesterday I received my 2010 Census paperwork. Today I put it back in the mailbox completed. Aren't I just a model citizen? Hey, either I do it right away or it gets buried in my mess and I won't find it til months later.
Don't look at me like that....like it never happens to anyone else.
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I spent some more time in the basement tonight trying to get my area organized. Well organize my area, do some laundry, and get rummage sale things priced and packed up. There you go...again I am a multi-tasker.
I am getting somewhere down there, but it is slow going. There is more down there then you would think and as I can't just sit down there and do it for any length of time, it stretches the task out. Some day though....Some day. I will have things happy down there and will be able to utilize the space.
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My cats are odd. The two of them together love each other completely as if they were from the same litter. However, they are polar opposites.
Buffy (our female) is more to herself. She will come to you when she needs loving. Many times this happens in the early...EARLY morning hours when she paws at the closet day until I hiss her name. At which point she jumps on the bed and comes up to me, as if to say, "Oh...you are awake. I love you....pet me!" And if, heaven forbid, I fall asleep before she feels that she has had enough love she will go paw at the closet again.
Lightning (our male) is loving ALL THE TIME! Seriously. Like annoyingly so. He will even follow you to the bathroom, sit on the girl's stool for the sink, and then 'meow' at you while sitting up on his back legs and waving his front ones in the air. He sleeps on the bed up next to my pillow. But at least he no longer sleeps on me. He is what the girls call, "our lover kitty".
However, Lightning will eat anything. The cat chews on shoes (especially the foam type), he actually ate a goldfish cracker off the floor the other day that Kaitlynn had dropped, and he is more active during the day then at night. He actually sleeps all night with me. Buffy won't even eat soft cat food. And trust me we've tried different kinds as treats. Buffy sleeps all day...in the sun that makes its way in the windows if possible.
Buffy also loves to be as high as possible. Lightning can't jump for the life of him and when put up high won't move. Pretty sure he is scared of heights. When people come over Lightning believes that they are here for him and because they have hands they should be petting him. Buffy usually goes and hides as soon as someone comes into the house. Though she is getting better about staying around.
They are so opposite and yet they are so compatible and inseparable. I can't imagine them being apart.
They are also a little crazy. Lightning tries to eat things that cats shouldn't and just today Buffy was laying on the back of the couch licking it. Yeah...they fit into this family perfectly.
