Looking for: part time worker to fill rest of full time position

Ladies and Gentlemen....we have schedules. For the girls' summer sports, that is.

This year Kalli is playing soccer (May-June) and Cassie is playing baseball (June-August). AND, in the month of June we only have one overlap. Yeah us! I really wouldn't even call it an overlap as Cassie's game starts at 4 and Kalli's doesn't start until 6. However, it is one of those days that we'll have to watch the time close.

If you haven't received a schedule from me and want one, please let me know. My brain is a part time worker only lately and I may have missed someone. I sent out email about 10 minutes ago.
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Tomorrow is my sleep study with a CPAP on and I'm really hoping that once this is all figured out, my brain will come back to work for me full time. I've grown a little attached and this time off is really a little upsetting.

On that note.... It is 1:30am and I'm off to bed.

My Perfect Mascot

Things have been a little crazy around here. I'm finding that I'm overwhelmed and am trying to slowly work on that. I've been trying to take a little time for myself lately and concentrating on taking better care of myself. This is something that I've neglected severely until recently. And now I find myself trying to find things to do that are more for me, but not without guilt. For example: one of the smaller things, we've been trying hard to stay home on Sundays as a family and spend time doing what "we" want to do. Of course I do feel guilty about this because I feel that I'm letting others down by not being there for them or doing things for others. And this is just a small example.

My therapist and I have been talking about my guilt issues and how I have to put myself first, but I have a hard time because I don't want to be selfish. And somehow my brain has programmed itself to think anytime I'm doing anything for myself, I'm being selfish. I want to be self-less. I want to give til it hurts.

Only problem is that I'm at the point where it is hurting. Hence the fact that I'm trying to take care of me. (sigh) But is most definitely not easy.
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Let's add to this the fact that the medicines that I'm on have been being shifted around and changes some so my body is messed up to say the least. Again...an example.

• 7-730am: Wake up
• 830am: Kids onto bus
• 9-10am: OMG I'm tired
• 10am-2pm: get stuff done, supper started, etc
• 2-4pm: OMG why on Earth am I so tired
• 4-8pm: get some stuff done, eat supper, help kids with stuff
• 8-830pm: WOO HOO I'm awake. Who wants to clean? Anyone wanna go for a walk outside? How about we reorganize the pantry? (This is the point at which Andy looks at me like I'm out of my mind and goes to bed - well at about 9/930pm)
• 830pm-12/1am: I clean, I play on the computer, I try to get rid of this WIDE AWAKE feeling. It doesn't stop until around 1 in the morning.
• 1am-ish: Lay down in bed and pass out
• 7-730am: rinse and repeat

And the best part is I can't seem to stop this cycle. Tomorrow night I go for a sleep study to see what is exactly going on when I sleep. Maybe this will shed a little light on things. Or at least I can hope.
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This past Sunday we had Easter Lunch with Andy's side of the family. His aunt took us all to Legends for their buffet and I have to say that it was pretty darn delicious. After we ate, I took the girls and my niece, Kyra, out to take some pictures. I would have taken Kaitlynn with, however, she was busy running around and enjoying herself. I managed to get some pictures of her later when she was sitting still for about 2 minutes. :)

First off we have Cassie. She is up a tree without a paddle. There was some beautiful trees around the restaurant so I took full advantage of them. Cassie is a little nervous without her feet on the ground, but smiled for me anyhow.


Then there is Kalli. She is a monkey at heart and loved when I lifted her up into the crevice of the tree. She stood there like a queen looking down at her subjects.

At a different tree we stopped and I got some pictures of the three girls together. I love that even with how different they all look, you can see that they are related. Cousins til the end. :)


Then I took a few of Kyra alone. She is turning into such a beautiful young lady. I honestly am not a fan of how grown up she is starting to look, but not much anyone can do about that. However, she still comes and sits on my lap to cuddle, so that is all that matters. Look at that picture...can you say senior picture??


Then there is my little peanut girl. Kaitlynn did sit still every now and then, but for the most part she was on the move. It is hard to keep a 15 month old down. She too is getting so big. I am not sure when that happened because I was there the day she was born...and I'm pretty sure that was just last week.




It was a nice day spent with family and visiting some. Afterwards, Andy and the girls dropped me at home so I could have some alone time and they headed over to his brother's house so that the cousins could play some more.
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As you know I fell a couple weeks back and ended up getting 10 stitches in my knee and an air cast on my opposite ankle. (and that isn't to mention the tetanus shot...ouch, hurts to think about it)

Stitches are out now and things are feeling much better. I purchased a more low-file brace for my ankle and I wear it if I am going to be doing a lot of stairs at home or if I'm going out anywhere. I will slowly stop wearing it at home and then probably will stop wearing it when just going to store or anything. Whenever I have to do a lot of walking on uneven ground though, you can bet it will be on my foot.

Miss Becky, got me a little something the other day and it fits me perfectly. Meet Mr Bump...

Becky says that he is perfect for me because I am always hurting myself. Which is very true. Mr Bump now lives right in front of my computer monitor to keep me company. We spend lots of time together, Mr Bump and me, because we have a lot in common. We both get hurt quite often. He is my perfect mascot. now if only he had a little camera hanging around his neck. Maybe I'll have to look through the girls' barbies or try to come up with something.

Thank you Becky :)

Paula: The Good Times, The Bad Times, and the Body that Hates Her

Last week Andy called me from work and told me that he had been called into a meeting with his team leader, supervisor, and the plant supervisor. It was a spontaneous meeting And the conversation went something like this...

Supervisor: We want to have a meeting with the plant supervisor, the team leader, you and I.
Andy: Alright...when?
Supervisor: Right now.
Andy: Okay...

He must have gotten that look on his face because his supervisor told him that it wasn't anything bad.

Andy went into the room and sat down, still nervous. It is at this point that they started telling him how much they appreciate everything that he has been doing. For several months now he has been coming in 2 hours early several times a week (some entire weeks) and learning part of the team leader's job. He has also been cross trained in many of the other ares of the plant in the past year. Andy has also done most of the team leader's job when she is not at work.
In the meeting, they said that some people would have quit or complained by now because of the extra work load and the expectations that have been placed on him. The supervisor and plant supervisor commended him on his attitude and his willingness to learn. They told Andy that he absorbs new information like a sponge and is then ready for new challenges.

And then...he was given a promotion. And a raise. I'm so unbelievably proud of him. His hours are changing some too. He was working 7-3:30, but now he will have to go in earlier so he will be working 5-1:30. While I have to admit that it has got to suck getting up so early in the morning. Is there really a A.M. version of 3:30? Seriously?? However, he is enjoying the being done at 1:30 and I am loving having him home earlier.
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Last week was the girls' Spring Break from school and while we didn't do too much extraordinary, we did have a nice week. The girls played in the basement a lot, showing me that they can get along and solve their own problems.

On Friday, the last day of Break, I took the girls to Chuck E. Cheese for pizza and games. However, before heading there for fun and excitement we stopped off at our local salons and Cassie got her eye brows waxed for the first time. As of late it seems that some of the hair on her face is starting to darken. Mainly eye brows and a little bit on the upper lip. We started with eye brows as well...honestly, I come from a family of uni-brows. Cassie inherited this wonderful trait as well.

Before: Uni-brow and hairy

She was very nervous going in and cried some, but after they did it the first pull she said that "it felt like pulling off a bandaid. Or like pulling the tape off when I tape her mouth shut." Huh???? Yes this is what she said in front of the ladies that were doing her and my waxes. So I had to clarify before Child Services was called. Every now and again when Cassie is talking up a storm and driving me insane I will use scotch tape and 'tape her mouth shut'. Cassie, however, made it sound like I duct taped her mouth on a daily basis...which by the way would eliminate the upper lip problem.

After all was said and done, Cassie loved it. She kept saying that she was so pretty now. And I kept correcting her by saying that she was always pretty...this just makes her eye brows look that little bit more defined and clean. And it is very true.

After: cleaned up and looking fairly good.
Next time I will have them round the insides a little more so it looks less treky looking.

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So, we've talked in the past about how my body hates me, right? And about how I'm very coordinated? Well...I have a story to show just how true these things are.

Sunday morning we were walking dogs and I rolled my ankle. Of course my ankle rolling and then giving out completely caused me to fall on the gravel road. I stopped my face from hitting the ground with my hands and surprisingly never lost the dog. As I was laying on the ground the dog, Emily, came back and looked at me as if to say, "why are you on the ground?"

Andy was a little ways in front of me and turned back to see me completing my fall to the ground and then rushed to see if I was okay. (fortunately he was the only one to see my embarrassment) I said that I was okay and I tried to get up and walk off the pain in my ankle. It wasn't really helping, but I was hoping. I then mentioned how my knee was really hurting and that I was sure it was scrapped up and that I'd have another bruise. I told Andy that I didn't want to look, but should. I pulled up my pants leg and what I saw made my stomach flip and Andy say "oh my God". It wasn't pretty. I had gouge in my knee and it looked like a flap of skin was hanging there some. I pulled my pant leg back down and thought about trying to walk this off as well, but I gave up and went back to the house.

Before: Open, fleshy looking boo-boo. This picture actually doesn't show how bad it really was.

Long story short...this was the end of my walking dogs for the day, I felt like a dork, and once we were back in town Andy and I headed for the ER. It was a blast and I came out with an air brace for my right ankle, 10 stitches in my left knee, a tetanus shot in my left arm, and antibiotics to be on for the next several days. Seriously, not that good of a time.

After: Bruises setting in now, the girls say my stitches make my skin look like they are lips.
It hurts to move my knee and just thinking about bumping it makes me cringe.

And now for the question of the evening. When you have an injured ankle/leg they tell you that when you are going up the stairs to lead with the good leg and when you are doing down the stairs to lead with the bad. Up with the good, Down with the bad. However, how do you do stairs when both legs are bad?? Yeah, I haven't figured it out yet either. For now I just do my best with as little moaning as possible and hope that I am not sweating by the time I get to the other end of the stairs. Yes, it is a sad life that I have here. I'm thinking of making a sitcom out of it. I'll just simply call it "Paula: Good Times, Bad Times, and the Body that Hates Her". Has a certain ring to it, doesn't it?
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I feel like I have so much more to post about, but sleep is a little more important and it is almost 11:00pm. I'll work on it tomorrow, if time presents itself. ;)

Bruises, Allergies, Flowers, oh my!

Look... I'm back. Two days in a row. Okay, yesterday didn't REALLY count. One paragraph isn't really a descent post, but at least it let you know that I was still alive.

Lately, however, I have been having problems with bruising. I have no idea where the bruises are coming from, but they just show up. I'm at the point where I find a new bruise almost every day. I have them on my arms. I have them on my legs. Anyone that didn't know me would think I was being abused. And I'm afraid that as the weather gets warmer and shorts come out I will get more looks. Think I'm exaggerating?

This my left arm with all the bruises that are fading...finally.

And then there is my right arm...

Then there is my left leg. This is the inside of my leg.
The outside has bruises as well, however they are fading.

This is my right leg. At least it is just one bruise.

And finally there is my upper left arm.
I know where this one is from, but let me just say that it shouldn't have caused all this bruising.

So yeah...I'm having a great time. Not knowing what is going on. My body is revolting...I think. Or something like that. I'm just hoping that it goes away. Soon. Either that or I may be wearing pants all summer.
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In other news, Cassie had allergy testing done on Monday. She has very sporadic allergies that include sneezing, itchy eyes and skin, runny nose, and lots of complaining. She had a total of 21 scratches done. 10 scratches in 2 batches and then one separate one.

She didn't enjoy the scratches...they don't feel the best to have done, but she took it in stride shedding only a few tears. Then when the itching started she became a little more irritated. The hardest part about allergy testing is the fact that you can NOT itch what-so-ever. This is enough to drive a person insane. I kept her sane for the time being by letting her play on my phone and showing her pictures of her back as the process went on.

This picture is a little bit after they started the 15 minute test period.
You can see that under the B section there are some reacting already.

This is towards the end of the 15 minutes. Just a couple more minutes to go.
You can easily see that there are some reactions. Some of the smaller reactions are hard to see though.

The largest reactions were from dust mites (bottom welt) and dust (above dust mites). Other reactions were for grass and mold. The smallest reactions, however, enough for them to write down...cats and gerbils.

Yes...my daughter is allergic to her pets. Fortunately, I have OCD and vacuum a lot so she isn't affected. Yeah for OCD!!

So now we are going through a cleaning process and getting hypoallergenic covers for her mattress and pillow. I also am drying all her stuffed animals (which harbor lots of dust mites) for an hour on high heat to kill the mites. It is keeping me busy but hopefully these things along with her allergy pills will keep her from going insane.
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At this moment I have more live flowers in my house then I've ever had at one time. Becky bought me some daisies last week because she is the best friend ever. They are bright and cheerful and I've now split the flowers between in the kitchen and bathroom to spread the beauty.

Colorful flowers from Becky...THANK YOU BECKY!!

Then, this weekend, Andy and I went out to a friend's bar and my friend bought me a rose. I am loving being able to see flowers throughout the day and I'm thinking that maybe I need to buy flowers every so often to cheer up my home.

Pretty rose from Bill.

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Lastly, a picture of the cutest little boy I know...

I did a little photo shoot with Brady today while he was with me. I think this is my favorite picture of him alone that I took today. I also got some pictures of him with Kalli. (Becky-I'm working on getting them all on disk for you. :)

The sweet prince. He is changing so much lately.
Look at him holding that head up like a champ. And those beautiful blue eyes. And that dimple that shows up when he smiles.

Yes...I am in love with Becky's little boy!

It's much easier to breathe now.

Alright, tonight you will be getting a couple posts because....well to be completely honest....because there is no way to connect the topics that I want to write about and not seem like I'm crazier then you already think I am. :)

Let's begin with the fact that I seem to be one of the only people that can hurt myself by doing absolutely nothing. Literally, nothing. Example: A while back I was sitting pretzel style on the floor with some of Kalli's class. One of my legs was falling asleep so I went to move my leg and suddenly I have sharp pain in my ankle. From that moment on it hurt to bend my ankle. I could stand on it, balance on it, but couldn't walk without pain. Explain that one.

I finally surrendered and went to see someone about it and they determined that I had a strained ligament. Not sprained, but strained. I would like someone to explain to me how you can possibly strain something you weren't even really using? I'm not sure the medical answer to that question, but I'm going to go with 'You must be special like me. And also the Body Parts Against Paula (BPAP) must want to start up meetings again.

This past weekend I was cleaning up and doing some dishes and I had the drawer under the oven open. I went to push it shut with my foot and ended up hurting my ankle. Again. The same hurt feeling I did before which means that while pushing shut a small metal drawer, I strained a ligament. Yes, I am a delicate flower. Thank you for asking.

I find it absolutely ridiculous, but there isn't much I can do about it. It is against BPAP rules for me to interfere. This leaves me to the advise I was given by the doctor on how to make it better. Heat, ibuprofen, and rest it. Then I was told that because I had arthritis in my ankles (knees, hips, lower back, and hands.....see I seriously am special. And broken. And only 31) I should keep using the joint so that it doesn't lose motion. Now if that isn't contradictory. So I'm resting, but not resting. Using heat on it when I'm not resting. And trying to find some drugs stronger then ibuprofen to knock myself the heck out. Because seriously?? I'm suing BPAP and my body.

Onto another one of my issues. I have many and picking just one is not an easy task. Oh, who am I kidding, it is very easy as this issue rules a good part of my life. And it is either getting worse or I'm just noticing it more.

OCD: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. An anxiety disorder that is characterized by recurrent, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and/or repetitive behaviors (compulsions). Sound like fun? Yeah....not so much. Though I still can't stop some of the things that bother me or make it difficult to breathe, I am finding some humor in it. "Laugh or you'll cry" is how I see it.

My most stand out compulsions that I obsess about have to do with straight lines and things being lined up "right". I actually take time and thought when opening the blinds in the morning to be sure they are even. My neighbors (bachelors) have blinds that are WAY uneven and it makes me wanna scream, run to their door and make them let me fix them. But I don't want to be that crazy lady that lives next door. So instead, when I see it, I practice breathing deep and wonder if they realize how hard it is to breathe when they are uneven. Which they ALWAYS are. And of course, now that I've brought it up I can't stop thinking about it and the air is thicker then normal. Look what I do for you, my one loyal reader.

To make myself feel a little better and show how much easier it is to breathe now let's look at a picture of my nice even blinds. Yes the one on the left isn't even all the way across and it is bothering me now that I've looked at this picture. Crap.

Moving on before I go crazy looking at the picture and my blinds.

I have an area up in my living room where I have toys for the little beans that I watch. There are six open bins for things to go in and everything has it's place and I like it when it looks like this. This is of course when Kaitlynn is not here or she is napping. I clean, she messes, I clean again. We have our jobs down path. Lately though, she likes to move things from their 'home' to another things 'home'. Meaning that she will put things in different bins. I'm sure this is because she is a toddler and likes to move things. Or it could be the fact that she knows Auntie has issues and she is just trying to push my buttons and see how long it takes to break me.

In fact, looking at this picture now, in the bottom right bin there is a cup that shouldn't be in there. That belongs in the penguin. Crap.

Alright, I've looked over this picture and I know that this one will help calm me. This is how books should look (except at the library....Becky told me that it wouldn't work in a real library because you wouldn't be able to find anything. Though wouldn't it be easier to breathe?) Since I was younger I would organize my books like this. I remember playing library and school with my cousin and I'd organize all my books on my shelves just like this. It calms me as I carefully check sizes and line them up so that all the spines are even. Just look....don't you feel like you are at a relaxing meditation spa?


Me too....

That is until this little bean wakes up to undo all the tranquility in my life.

Good thing I love her as much as I do. And that she goes home every so often so that I can clean again.

NaBloPoMo - Day 16

This morning I got the girls got off to school, called my doctor's office while feeding Kaitlynn (who stayed over last night :) and then waited for a call back from the nurse.

I told the nurse what has been going on with my ankle and she said that I really needed to get it evaluated, but that my doctor was booked for the day. She suggested that I go over to the other side of town to the Urgent Care. I said that I would, somewhat grudgingly.

When Becky got here for our Monday morning hang-out I informed her that I had to go across town and we headed out. Note of importance to this story: Becky took her own vehicle so that we could stay on that side of town and then she could just go from there to work.

We drove across town, Becky in her car following me in my van with Kaitlynn in her seat. Here is where the fun starts. I get to the other side of town via the highway and as I am on the off ramp and slowing down I hear a thunk thunk thunk sound. My first though? CRAP!

I turn off of the exit ramp without having to stop...which is a good thing. The thunk thunk thunk continues and I feel the car pulling to the left. I see the light ahead is red and I know that stopping is only going to make going again more difficult. As I turn onto the road the urgent care place is on I'm basically crawling and feeling very glad that I don't have far to go because driving very far like this wouldn't be a good thing.

I park in the first spot I find and get out to look at my tire. Sure enough....completely flat. Thought at that point...something a little stronger then CRAP and then something about just wanting to laugh so I don't cry, I should have stayed home, and what the hey am I gunna do now?

Once seeing the tire, I think Becky understood why I was crawling down the road and also why I had parked on the opposite side of the building from Urgent Care.

After getting my ankle checked out I remembered that through my car insurance I have roadside assistance so I called, made sure I in fact did have roadside assistance and that there would be no cost to me, and then asked them to send help. I did have a spare with me, but who knows if I would have been able to get the tire off or spare on easily. Besides, isn't that what guys are for?? For the record though, I do know how to change a tire.

Here is where things get more fun. The wait time for my hero to ride in on their steed is 55 mintues. Do you remember the fact that I have Kaitlynn with me? The almost one year old little girl? The little girl that likes to move around alot and do things? Yeah. Wanna guess how happy I was when I got this news?

Fortunately, Becky ran to get some food, I fed Kaitlynn and let her crawl around in the back of the van, and it didn't take long for my hero to ride into the parking lot. They found me, put my spare on, and showed me how horrible my tire was. Metal was showing and tonight Andy found that there was also a nail in the tire. Me... I touched the wire thinking it would be more flexible then it was and ended up with a small prick in my finger bleeding. Yeah...I'm good like that.

Tomorrow I'm going to be bringing the van in to have other tires checked and will get 2 new tires. Even more fun!

After reading all that you may or may not remember that I had my ankle looked at today. So it isn't sprained, which I knew as I've had many sprains and I also could put full weight on it. They also don't think anything is broken...and seriously how is it possible to break something when you are just sitting on the floor? So the diagnosis is that I strained the ligaments in my ankle. I am to take it easier for the next few days (which will be fun as I run around getting tires done) and use heat and ibuprofen for pain. I am also suppose to keep using it some so that it doesn't tighten up or the arthritis that I have doesn't get worse. (yes, I am young to have arthritis...I'm special like that. Also...my body hates me) So rest, but keep going, and also...while you are at it, do it with a smile. Another side note: On Friday Cassie has a field trip to tour some caves...this includes steep stairs and I'm chaperoning. And on Sunday I'm going to walk dogs. It'll be fun, but if I rest now I'll be able to walk with no problem by then. Right? Right??

Over all it was a good day, but for a while there I wanted to bury my head in the sand on some nice warm beach and wish everything away. These things only seem to happen when Andy isn't around for them. However, they do make good blogging subjects.

NaBloPoMo - Day 12

Sing it with me.....

Hal-le-lujah. Hal-le-lujah.

As of 10:18 tonight my calendars are complete. This is to say that I have 5 calendars with all the months, numbering, topper, little details, and holidays on them. And I am thrilled!

I can now work on a cover for them, decide who gets which, and put in birthdays. Then once I get the rest of the year's pictures picked out and ordered, I can just attach them and...ta da. They are done.

The relief that this brings is something that I don't even think I can put into words. I feel like I'm ahead of schedule and can breathe a little bit.
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Today I was volunteering at school...pretty much all day. From 9-1140 I was in Kalli's classroom and then I was in the library from 1140-3. I really do like being there and helping out. The teacher told another volunteer that I'm a life savor because I am able to be there so much. And the librarian is thrilled with me because I work hard and get things done correctly yet quickly.

When I went to sign out for the day the secretary looked up and asked me if I had been there all day. I laughed some and said that yes, I had been...but that I had been in two different areas. She just shook her head and told me that there was a cot and blankets in back for the kids when they need to lay down, but if I wanted I could just move in. I'm still thinking about it. I have to say I'd miss my family, but I could live without the whining and fighting that goes on pretty much daily.
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The Body Parts Against Paula (BPAP) is again holding meetings. Today while in Kalli's class, I was sitting on the floor with some of the kids and went to move one of my legs slightly and it caused pain in my ankle. I then moved it back and again there was pain. The rest of the day I was careful, but it continued hurting and anytime I had to bend it there was pain. Ps...you have to bend your ankle anytime you walk. I haven't missed the BPAP meetings and anytime they want to move on, it would be great.

I would like to note that I took socks off and pulled up my pants legs to have Andy look at my ankles side by side and his exact first words were, "wow...it is swollen". Most of the swelling is behind the ankle bone so we are thinking that I must have somehow pulled a tendon or ligament, but I have no idea how.
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One last thing. We are now 12 days into November (just about half way through the month) and I'm still blogging and have posted every day. I know, I'm impressed too. GO ME!

September 15, 2008

This morning after getting the girls on buses Andy and I chilled at home for a little bit before heading to the hospital. My procedure went without a hitch. The findings are that I have an irritated spot in my stomach. They are upping my meds for 2 months in hopes that it calms things down so that things heal. I'm just hoping to go back to bed. I'm so sleepy and I say this after sleeping for most the day.
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We're into the third week of school and I'm proud to report that Kalli is liking school. On Sunday, I told her that she would have school the next day and she got all excited. She enjoys getting on bus, waving to me, and loves to tell me about her day when she is home. Though not right away. If you ask her about her day right when she gets home, she just shrugs her shoulders. She needs her space and time before she is ready to give details.

On Sunday mornings the girls have been having Sunday school. This past week, which was the 2nd week, Kalli was singing with the big group and doing the motions. She even moved away from her teacher some. When it is time to go to her class, she walks past Andy and I smiling.

It is such a nice change from the clinging.

I knew it was only a matter of time for her to realize that the separation from me isn't permanent and to enjoy herself. I am just glad that it didn't take too long.

If any part of this post doesn't make sense, I am sorry. My head is still quite foggy.

September 13, 2008

I've been lacking in the posting department lately, I know. I've also been lacking in the follow through department as well. And I apologize to anyone that these things have affected. To make my point I'll have you know that Andy's birthday is one week from today. And have I made any concrete plans to celebrate the occasion? Nope. Sure, I've mentioned a party on that day. But I haven't decided on a time, what we'll be having, invited people. I know...I suck.

In all fairness, I haven't been feeling well. The "Body Parts Against Paula" meetings are back in session.

In 2 days (on Monday) I'll be going to the hospital. For a long time now I haven't been feeling good. Nausea and abdominal pain, mostly. Two months ago I went in and was prescribed Nexium. This helped while I was on 2 pills a day, but since going down to 1 (which is what should be done daily) things have gotten worse again. Worse to the point that I fight nausea throughout the day (worst in the morning) and have been woken up by the abdominal pain.

I finally gave in and called the doctor. This past Thursday I went in for an appointment where we discussed what was all going on. They did blood work to check my liver and pancreas and sent me home. Friday they called and said that my liver enzymes look good...still waiting on pancreas results to come back, but that they want to send me for a stomach scoping (endoscopy). About 10 minutes later the GI department called and I was scheduled for my scoping for Monday.

I've had a scoping done before while I was still in high school and at that time they found a "raw spot" in my stomach. I'm interested to know what they find this time. I'm just hoping they find why I'm hurting and nauseous so much. The way I figure it, with this much nausea I should get a baby in 8 months!

September 7, 2008

Yesterday started out like pretty much any other day. However, about half way through the day the base of my head on the left side started hurting. I recognized the feeling of an oncoming headache and downed a Mountain Dew, hoping to stop the headache in its tracks. It didn't work. By about 3, I was in agony with a full blown migraine. I hadn't noticed the fact that since my shunt surgery, over a hear ago, I haven't had any headaches. I didn't miss them.

Luckily, I have a wonderful husband. Andy brought me home and let me go to bed. I was in bed, asleep by about 6:00 and slept until this morning. I woke up with the pain in the base of my head still, but have kept the migraine at bay all day. Thank goodness.

Tomorrow I am calling the doctor about my ongoing nausea and if pain is still in my neck bad, I'll mention that as well.

BPAP back in session

Not a whole lot to report here. My body is again holding meetings of Body Parts Against Paula (BPAP) Seems that my stomach has joined in and as a side effect of the meeting I now have a cold. Wanna know how much I'm enjoying it? Not. At. All.

On Monday I went to the doctor because of severe stomach pain that I've been having for 2 weeks and nausea that I've been dealing with for about a month. The diagnosis, I have raw areas in my stomach due to my acid reflux (which hasn't been under control for a while.) While we are pretty sure I have no ulcers yet, I need to get things under control before it gets worse. For the time being, that means watching what I eat (caffeine, foods that my stomach doesn't like, etc.) and also adding a acid controlling pill to my regiment.

Hopefully this will end the BPAP meetings for now. I can hope.

The girls have been very helpful lately as they know that I'm not feeling up to par. Today while I was sitting on the couch with Cassie, she reached over and started rubbing my back. She is so sweet and compassionate. I hope that this is a trait she always has.

Welcome Back!

Yes, I know I took a couple days off. I just needed a break. Everyone gets vacations once in a while...right?

Today I had an appointment with my doctor to try to figure out what is wrong me. Stop...don't even say what you are thinking. Let me clarify. For about the last two and a half months, my legs have been achy, painful limbs. Sometimes deciding to just plain ol' hurt. There is no rhyme or reason to this, though it does get worse as the day goes on. About 3 weeks ago or so my back/hips decided to join in on this party for, Body Parts Against Paula (BPAP). The BPAP use to meet only every so often, but have now moved their meetings up to daily. And they must be having a good time because their meetings are the longest ever....it is like Mardi Gras. No one wants to go home.

My doctor decided that it is probably arthritis in my back/hips and legs. If I'm like this now, I don't want to know what shape I'll be in when I actually get old. I am now on steroids for the next week to try calming things down. If this doesn't work then we move onto therapy to see if they can do something to help it and finally onto an MRI of my lumbar to see what the hey is going on in there. If we do get to that point, I've decided that I'm going to book a theater and charge admission so that everyone can see the meeting of the BPAP.

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In other news...

As my hair is growing out I'm trying to decide what to do with it. Keep it short? Grow it longer again? I've also tried bangs. I haven't had bangs since I was in middle school and at that point they didn't want to do what I wanted them to do. They liked to obey the cowlick and look like McDonald arches.

The other night after my shower I decided to see how it would look if I pulled bangs forward. And since I'm stuck waiting for my hair to grow out (which seems to be taking a long time) I'll give them a try for a while.

Surprisingly, I like them. And everyone that sees them likes them too. And to add the cherry to the top of this sundae, no more McDonald arches. So I'm considering keeping them. At least until I get bored with them :)