December 22, 2008

I've been slacker when it comes to posting, I know. You'll have to forgive me as I'm trying to get everything done for Christmas, Cassie's birthday is on Wednesday (Christmas Eve), and I'm dealing with a never ending waterworks.

Last night I was up until midnight crying and this morning I was wishing that someone would just give me a shot of something that would dry up my eyes and make me sleep. I'm having a hard time dealing with my grandmother's death this Christmas. Last year I was so numb during Christmas that I just went through the motions. This year, though, hurts. I've been dealing with some headaches from the crying and my shunt just ached this morning when I woke. I've been trying to hold back the seemingly endless trickle of tears. Unfortunately, if I hold them back from trickling, sooner or later the damn brakes and I sob.

The other day, out of the blue, Kalli said, "I miss great-grandma." I answered, "Me too honey. Me too." And I do. I miss my grandma something awful this year. And honestly I HATE this.

In hopes to end this on a happier note. This past weekend the girls decorated cookies I made and also decorated a gingerbread house. Tons 'o Fun!

Kalli's side of the gingerbread house (Note: I decorated the front :)

Cassie's side of the house.

The girls decorated cookies.