October 13, 2009

I want to begin by saying that this new mix of meds that I am on is absolutely awesome. I have energy and can go-go-go during the day. Come evening...anytime from 7:30-9:00...depending on how active I've been that day, I hit a wall and all of a sudden I'm tired. I go to bed and fall asleep within about a half hour. Instead of the hours that it use to take me to fall asleep. I also pretty much sleep through the night. I wouldn't say that I enjoy mornings because I don't ever think I will be a morning person, but mornings are bearable now and I don't feel like biting anyone's head off if they dare try to hold a conversation with me in the A.M. hours.

I've also noticed that I feel more...level. I'm not sure if that is the best way to explain it but I feel like I always feel pretty much the same now. I don't feel like I am on this roller coaster of emotions and moods. I know that people that have to deal with me on a regular basis have noticed this too. (hi mom! hi Andy!) I enjoy doing things more and have the energy to do them.

For example: Today I got up and got the girls ready for school. I brought them to school as I was volunteering to help put Tuesday Envelopes together. I was at school working til 11:00. I then headed out to have lunch with Becky, back home to clean some before my niece arrived, and headed out again to go get my dad from work to bring him home. After this it was back home to play with my niece some and clean more until the girls got home. Once everyone was home, Becky came over. There was eating that was done and grocery shopping and finishing up of Baby Shower Invites. And now I'm sitting in bed posting while Andy sleeps (the poor guy is working 50 hour weeks...getting up at 3:30 in the morning...and is now getting a cold) It is just 10:00 and I'm sleepy, but not overly so. I'm loving it!

Now this isn't to say that I don't have bad days from time to time or that I don't have any more anxiety/panic attacks. Because I certainly do. They are just more infrequent and seem to be easier to deal with.

And to think I had kept putting off going in to see about what could be done about my meds and such for how long. If I knew that I could feel this much better I wouldn't have waited so long.

I finally did it. Something that I've been putting off for as long as possible. I've turned on the heat.

Yesterday I broke down because 1) everyone was chilly, 2) I knew I'd have Baby Bella today and 3) it was 56 degrees in the house. Sure that is cold, but I don't want to pay for heat yet. Did you know that yesterday's high was 41? One year ago yesterday the high was 82. How is that even possible? I mean geez!

In my defense...our place was built in 1978 and I think that the windows are original ones to this place. Therefore, there are gaps when the windows are closed and the windows aren't very weatherproof. I didn't want to heat the outside or pay more then I have to to heat our home. I haven't yet gotten around to putting up the plastic on the windows and am looking also for some kind of temporary caulk that I can put where the gaps are for weatherproofing.

I tried the approach of put on slippers or a sweater with my family, but finally gave in because my fingers were getting really cold. I draw the line at having to wear gloves indoors. My decision to turn the heat on was well recieved...go figure. And yesterday evening the cats could be found laying alongside the vents enjoying the warmth. Mind you I'm keeping the heat down lower for the time being, but there are no complaints yet or talk of overthrowing me so I think we're good.